


Which Little Voice in my Head is my Conscience?

by CornOwl



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Temporary Character Death, happy? ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-02
Updated: 2016-10-02
Packaged: 2018-08-19 02:05:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8184883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CornOwl/pseuds/CornOwl
Summary: Frisk is almost finished with a No-Mercy run when they get cold feet, but unfortunately for them, that little heart shaped locket they picked up is now serving as an anchor for Chara's soul. So long as they wear it, they won't be able to stop doing exactly as Chara tells them to, although nothing will stop Frisk from complaining about it.With only two fights left, will anyone be able to stop Frisk's rampage or will they make it to the surface for another murder spree? And more importantly, what's the point of a reset button if Chara never plans to use it?**Warnings for suicide and characters talking about suicide, because Frisk is a sad, desperate little bean.





	

**Author's Note:**

> (This story is based on a personal headcanon of mine that when Frisk gets the locket at the end of the no mercy route, Chara uses it as a sort of grounding influence to keep their’s and Frisk’s souls inseparably linked. It gives Chara a lot more influence over Frisk’s actions, and makes it almost impossible for Frisk to throw off that influence, especially when they’ve been listening to it for so long already. But because Chara did that, if the locket ever came off, Chara’s influence over Frisk would be instantly reduced.
> 
> Also, I think I accidentally wrote Frisk in sort of their mid teens or something, because they sound way too adult in this story. I think maybe its because I saw this: (http://the-orator.tumblr.com/post/132684734548/were-still-inseparable-after-all-these-years) before I started writing this. Whoops.)

“One more time, alright? I know you can do it this time.”

“You said that last time.”

“Okay, but this time it’s definitely true. Trust me.”

Frisk took one last look at the button behind them and sighed, pressing ‘continue’ instead.

 

 

Frisk ran down the gold hallway toward the triple columns they’d seen way too many times before. When Sans showed up in front of them, they just glared.

“Hmm… That expression… That’s the expression of someone who’s died ten times already. Suffice to say, you look really… unsatisfied.” He chuckled. “Sure you don’t wanna just give up?”

Frisk just rolled their eyes.

“Alright, let’s do this then.”

Immediately, Sans threw Frisk back into a wall of bones. Frisk dodged the first few attacks, jumping through a line of bones and sliding neatly out of the way of the “Gaster Blasters” Sans seemed so fond of.

He laughed. “You’ve gotten pretty good at this, kid! But can you keep it up?”

Frisk lunged at him, knife outstretched. For what seemed like the billionth time, the blade met only air.

Bones were flying at Frisk, faster this time. One clipped their shoulder, another nailed them directly in the gut, but Frisk didn’t even have time to keel over. They rolled out of the way just as three bones slammed into the ground where they had been standing. Another swing and a miss. Sans tripped them with a well placed bone and Frisk fell on their face. They lifted their head to glare at Sans.

“What, you think I’m just going to stand there and take it?” He backed away they jumped up to flail their knife at him again. “You got another thing coming, pal.”

Frisk threw themself after Sans, swinging wildly, but Sans seemed to always be just out of their reach. “Argh, just GIVE UP AND DIE ALREADY! I AM SEEING THIS THROUGH TO THE END AND YOU CAN’T STOP ME!” Frisk shouted angrily.

Sans grinned wider. “Hey, take it from me, kid, someday _you_ gotta learn when to give up!” A line of bones slammed into Frisk from behind. They pitched forward, just as Sans stuck out a foot. Standing over Frisk, Sans said, “And that day’s today! ‘Cause, you see… All this fighting’s really tiring me out, so if you keep pushing me, I’ll be forced to use my Special Attack.”

Frisk stared up at Sans, breathing heavily. _That’s new. He’s never mentioned a special attack before._ Frisk shook off the thought and stood. “Alright, then. Let’s see it,” they muttered.

Sans chuckled. “For someone so determined, you’re way too eager to lose. Alright then, survive _this_ and I’ll show you my Special Attack.”

And suddenly everything was chaos. Frisk was flung backward, dodging bones as they went, but still taking a lot of hits. Bones stuck out from the walls, and Frisk slammed directly into them. Then suddenly there were lasers flying everywhere. Frisk lept behind a column. But before they could even catch their breath, another line of bones was hurtling toward them. They jumped out of the way and hit the ground, hard. Bones rained down on top of them, landing a few more good hits. Then Frisk was being lifted into the air. They tried to squirm out of Sans’ power, but they’d have won the fight ages ago if that actually helped. Then they were being thrown away again, faster than ever before, and this time Sans didn’t stop when Frisk hit the wall. He kept up the pace, flinging Frisk back and forth between the walls and ceiling and floor. Frisk couldn’t even brace themself for each impact. Finally they were dropped to the floor again and this time, they didn’t move.

For a few moments, Frisk just stared up at the ceiling and listened to their own heaving breaths. Then slowly they tilted their head back to look at Sans. He was gasping for breath too.

“Alright… that’s it… It’s time for my Special Attack. Are you ready? Here goes nothing…”

Frisk groaned in pain and irritation, even as the voice in their head commented, _He looks exhausted. There’s no way he can manage another attack in that state… So get UP, Frisk!_

“ _Shut up, Chara_ ,” Frisk groaned, but rolled over anyway. They pushed themself gingerly to their feet, and then caught sight of Sans’ expression.

His face was contorted into an almost-grin, but his eyes were narrowed, and the left one was flickering oddly. “What- what’s that you said, kid?” he murmured.

Frisk glared and pushed up their sleeves. “Nothing. Let’s get on with it already.”

Sans just looked at them, head slightly tilted. “Who were you talking to?”

“Nobody,” Frisk growled. “Now come on!”

“...Chara’s dead, kid.”

_He’s stalling for time._

“I KNOW THAT!” Frisk yelled.

“Then who are you talking to?”

_Just hurry up and kill him already!_

“SHUT UP SHUT UP!”

Sans’ eyes widened. Frisk lept forward, swinging the knife wildly again.

“Ha,” Sans started, “did you really think you could catch me off-”

Frisk’s blade finally met its target. Their arm jarred with the impact after hitting only air for so long. Sans stared at the knife in shock for a moment before collapsing to the ground.

Still breathing heavily, Frisk slowly approached Sans.

_Hey! Be careful! This might be a trick! He hasn’t turned to dust, so that means he’s not dead!_

“Yet,” Frisk muttered. They stepped over to his body.

Sans’ eye flickered weakly at them. “I guess that’s it, huh? So what happens next… Chara?”

Inside Frisk’s head, Chara only chuckled. Frisk’s hand unconsciously moved to rest on the locket around their neck. “You lose, Sans. I finally beat you. So that means that _I’m_ moving on. See you… or not.” Frisk turned away.

“You don’t have to listen to them, kid.” Sans’ voice was so uncharacteristically sincere, Frisk had to spin around to make sure he was really the one talking. “You don’t have to let Chara control you. In fact, we’d probably all be better off if you did something about them. I’ll see you in the next round, so you better not let me down, okay, kid?”

And then there was nothing but a pile of dust at Frisk’s feet. Frisk stared blankly at it for several long moments. Something wet dripped onto the floor.

 _Oh, come on. You’re crying_ **_again_ ** _?! I thought we got rid of_ **_baby_ ** _Frisk ages ago! Suck it up._

Frisk wiped a couple tears away forcefully. “I’m not crying. Let’s go.”

 

 

Frisk hurried down the corridor and into the next room. They stopped abruptly. An unidentifiable emotion flowed out of Chara at the sight of the King.

“What? Don’t tell me _you’re_ getting cold feet,” Frisk muttered.

_Of course not. But maybe you should go ahead and start the fight already. Seriously, we don’t have all day._

Frisk grunted and leapt forward. Asgore reacted surprisingly quickly, swinging his trident around in time to stop the blow.

“Young one… Who are you? What are you doing here?” Asgore asked worriedly.

Frisk didn’t respond and launched into a flurry of attacks, each of which were brushed away with a swing of Asgore’s weapon. The King even managed to return several blows, forcing Frisk to roll out of his reach.

The fight continued for several seconds as Asgore continued to launch attacks in between blocking Frisk’s. Frisk felt both their’s and Chara’s anger begin to rise to the surface. However, some part of them realized that Asgore was beginning to slip up. He hadn’t fought a proper battle in years, and the strain was starting to affect him. Frisk launched forward with vigor toward an opening Asgore had left in his defenses.

Time seemed to slow. Frisk stretched out the knife to plunge it into Asgore’s side, then suddenly, the opening they’d seen was gone. Instead, Frisk saw Asgore’s trident plunging toward them. Frisk dug their heels into the floor, hoping to gain some purchase to leap away from the oncoming death, but they were moving too quickly. They had launched themself right into the trident’s path. At any moment, it would tear through their body, ripping them to shreds.

Asgore suddenly froze his attack, staring intently at Frisk’s neck. Taking advantage of his distraction, Frisk swung their knife at Asgore. He just barely managed to move out of the way. Frisk was so sick of missing everything they tried to kill.

“...Chara?” Asgore murmured gently. He wasn’t staring at Frisk any longer. Frisk looked over their shoulder. Hovering just behind them, a mostly-transparent Chara rested their hands on Frisk’s shoulders. Frisk couldn’t feel them at all. “Chara… what are you doing?”

“ _We’re going to leave the underground and kill all the humans on the planet! Doesn’t that sound amazing… ‘Dad’?”_ Chara laughed in Frisk’s ear.

Before Frisk could tell Chara off, Asgore said slowly, “Ah... Now I see... Then... perhaps I can give you a choice, young one.” Frisk caught sight of Asgore thrusting his trident directly at them. Frisk dodged to the left, but the point of the weapon still caught them, tearing upwards from Frisk’s collarbone to their jaw and cheek. Frisk ducked under the trident and slashed downward, knife cutting into Asgore’s body. The King crumpled to the floor and turned to dust.

Frisk breathed deeply for a few seconds, feeling a strange emptiness in the pit of their stomach. “There, are you happy now, Chara? I killed your dad for you. That’s what you wanted right?” Chara didn’t respond. Frisk’s hand flew to their throat. “Chara?”

_-sk._

Frisk’s fingers searched unsuccessfully for the locket, instead brushing against the wound Asgore had given them. Frisk hissed in pain, glancing down at their blood-smeared fingers. With his last attack, Asgore had knocked the locket off Frisk’s neck.

_-isk!_

The voice was barely audible, even inside Frisk’s head. They turned around. Chara hovered three feet away, the locket laying at their feet. Frisk walked over to them immediately.

“Well? _Are_ you happy now?”

 _Yeah, yeah, overjoyed._ Chara’s voice was strangely quiet. _Can we get going? Lots of humans to kill. Just pick up the locket and we can cross through the barrier._

Frisk sighed, but reached down anyway. “Could _you_ speak up? I can barely hear-” Frisk’s hand froze over the locket. “-barely hear you…” they finished quietly, slowly retracting their arm.

_Frisk, what are you doing?!_

Frisk backed up slowly, clutching their hand to their chest. “I… I don’t want to do this anymore.”

Chara frowned, eyebrows lowering. _...What?_

Frisk stood up straighter. “I said, I don’t want to do this anymore!”

 _You can’t just quit!_ Chara tried to yell, but their voice still sounded quiet to Frisk.

“I can! I quit! I don’t want to follow your STUPID ORDERS ANYMORE!” Frisk shouted, throwing the knife at Chara. It passed through them and clattered to the floor.

Chara clenched their fists. _Oh yeah? Then what are you going to do instead? EVERYONE WHO MIGHT HAVE CARED ABOUT YOU IS DEAD!_

Frisk felt their breath hitch. Sans’ last words came back to them. Their eyes fell on the knife. “...then I’ll reset.”

For a moment, Chara looked almost scared. Then they composed themself. _You can’t! Resetting is MY power! It has ALWAYS been MY power, just like bringing you back to life all those times was MY POWER. You’re not special, Frisk. YOU’RE just another human who fell into the underground! YOU’RE just the human who woke me up! YOU’RE just the human that was stupid enough to FOLLOW MY ORDERS! You’re NOBODY, Frisk. You’re NOBODY without ME!_

Frisk didn’t move, didn’t even breathe, as Chara stood there glaring at them.Then they narrowed their eyes and walked past Chara. They picked up the knife.

Now Chara really looked scared. _What are you doing? DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT FRISK!_

“But Chara, it doesn’t matter whether I live or die,” Frisk said flatly, turning to stare at Chara, “because I’m nobody, remember?”

 _What about Sans?_ Chara sounded frantic now. _Are you just going to let him down? He said he’d see you in the next round. If you quit now, that’ll never happen!_

“You’d never let it happen anyway. So if restarting’s off the table and nobody else can win, you might as well lose too.” Frisk lifted the knife to their throat and grinned at the horrified look on Chara’s face. “Bye Chara.” Frisk ripped the knife through their neck. They barely even had time to be grateful that unconsciousness took them immediately.

 

 

 

 

 

 

It took them a long time to realize they still had a consciousness. Without Chara’s constant nagging, Frisk almost couldn’t recognize their own mind. Eventually, though, they realized there seemed to be light trying to slip through their eyelids. None of their other senses were working. They opened their eyes slowly, not sure what to expect.

Blackness surrounded them on all sides. They weren’t even laying on anything. It seemed there was absolutely nothing in this space except for them.

And except for the word RESET, glowing softly in front of them.

Frisk grinned. “Chara lied,” they whispered, reaching out for the button.

But then they stopped. Their hand shook. “If- if I start over… I’ll just have to deal with Chara again. I can’t- I don’t think I can do that,” Frisk muttered, voice thick. They dropped their hand back to their side. “...but nobody gets a happy ending this way. They’re all just… gone. Except, even if I _do_ restart, if I can’t stop Chara then we’ll all just end up here again.” For the first time in a while, tears began to flow freely from Frisk’s eyes. “...I don’t _want_ to try again! I don’t want to go through all that a second time! I- I don’t want to _fail again_!” Frisk sobbed.

For a long time, Frisk floated in the nothingness, crying loudly. Eventually, though, the tears stopped flowing, and their breathing started to even out. They stared at the glowing reset button, expression dull.

“What do I do.”

Their voice sounded muffled, like they were speaking into fog.

“Somebody please tell me what to do! Chara, Sans, anyone. Please!”

Two more tears slipped out, but their expression didn’t change.

“Anyone. Please.”

The darkness didn’t respond. Frisk stared a while longer, then slowly, almost mechanically, their hand rose to the button. As soon as their fingers connected Frisk vanished in a warm flash of light.

  


 

 

Frisk woke up on a bed of golden flowers. They only had a second to hope before a familiar voice broke the silence.

_Wow. Nice going, idiot. Now we have to do that ALL OVER AGAIN!_

Frisk only groaned and curled into a ball.

 _Well, what are you waiting for? GET UP!_ Chara ordered, but their voice was still quiet and easily ignored.

“Maybe I can just lay here forever and never do anything. Nobody will get a particularly happy ending, but at least they’ll all be alive. That’s probably as good as it’s going to get,” Frisk muttered to themself.

_What? No! That’s the worst idea you’ve ever had. Just get up so we can get back to where we were before!_

Frisk didn’t bother to respond.

Chara continued to scream at Frisk to Go! Get moving! Start killing! But Frisk tuned them out, letting themself drift in absent thought, not quite conscious, but not not exactly unconscious either. The light that filtered down from the surface was warm, and it seemed to wrap around Frisk, encouraging them to stay where they were. They buried their face deeper into the flowers and breathed in their sweet scent.

“If everything could just stay like this, it would be perfect.”

“Oh dear! Young one, are you alright?”

Frisk pressed their face into the blossoms in frustration. “No! Toriel!” they said quietly.

 _See?_ Chara said. _You can’t stop it from happening. No matter what, I’m always going to win in the end._

“No…” Frisk moaned.

“Oh my! What is the matter, dear?” Toriel asked, running her hands over Frisk, checking for injuries.

“Go away.”

“What? I- I could never just leave a child like you here by yourself!”

Frisk finally looked up at Toriel. The instant they saw her face, their eyes filled with tears and they gripped at Toriel’s arms. “Please! I don’t want to hurt you! Just leave me alone,” they sobbed. Toriel looked shocked at that. Frisk’s eyes lit up. “Better yet, please just kill me! That would be the best option!”

_Frisk, no! Don’t be an idiot._

Toriel’s eyebrows flew up and her mouth dropped open in horror. “I- I- I could never…! A child such as yourself… I don’t understand! How can you ask for something like that?”

Frisk rolled over, letting out a short sob. “If you won’t do it, then just leave.”

_Frisk, you’re being a baby._

“Well I reset, didn’t I?” They said quietly. “So I guess that means you got baby Frisk back.”

_Ugh._

Toriel didn’t move for a while. Even her breaths were almost too quiet to be heard. Frisk wondered if she might actually have left while they were talking to Chara. But then she spoke again.

“If I leave you here, will you try to kill yourself?” she asked softly.

“...Probably,” Frisk muttered.

Toriel gave a small gasp. “Then I have no choice. I must take you back with me!” Before Frisk could protest, she scooped them up into her arms and turned back toward the ruins.

“Ack! No! Put me down! Stop!”

_That’s Toriel for you. Can’t stop from butting into every hopeless case. Although I guess I shouldn’t complain too much, since this time it’s working in my favor._

“You’ll regret this, I know you will! Just leave me here, I’ll go find somewhere else to die and you can just pretend you never saw me! It’ll be like I never fell down here, I promise! Toriel!”

Toriel jerked to a stop. She peered down at the child in her arms and asked, “Young one, how do you know my name?”

Frisk floundered for a moment, grasping for a believable story.

_Oh, great, now you’ve done it. Why do you always mess everything up, Frisk?_

“I- I don’t-” Frisk hung their head. “I was here before,” they said, shame choking their words until they were barely more than a whisper. “I was already here, in… in another timeline.”

 _Frisk, what are you doing?!_ Chara shrieked.

“I- I killed you,” Frisk squeaked, tears slipping out of their tightly shut eyes. “I killed everyone in the ruins, and then I went through the door and killed everyone in the underground. And… I was going to go kill all the humans on the surface, too, but…”

Chara’s voice began to pitch higher as their screaming continued nonstop, but it was barely noticed by Frisk, as tears began to flow more freely down their cheeks.

“I’m sorry! I didn’t want to, but Ch- Chara told me to! But I reset everything! Nobody’s dead now, everything is fine, and the only way to keep it that way is to kill me!” Frisk finally looked back up at their adoptive mom, tears shining in their eyes. “Toriel please! I don’t want to kill you again, please!”

By now, Toriel’s eyes were also wet with tears. “Oh, my dear…” She clutched Frisk tightly to her chest, murmuring reassurances in their ear as they sobbed uncontrollably.

The tears slowly began to subside, and Toriel whispered, “Young one, even if all of that is true, you will always be welcome in my home as long as that is where you wish to be.” Frisk’s breath hitched and they let out another sob. “And from now on, I would like you to focus only on what _you_ want, not what someone _else_ tells you to want. Can you do that for me?”

With their face still pressed into Toriel’s shoulder, Frisk nodded.

“Very good. Now let’s go _home_.”

 

 

“One more time. I know _I_ can do it this time,” Frisk whispered the words like a mantra as they faced the door to the underground.

They didn’t hear her approach, but suddenly, Toriel had placed a comforting arm around their shoulders.

“I also know you can do this, though I wish you didn’t have to.” Toriel turned her face away for a moment. “You know, you don’t _have_ to do this. You’re welcome to stay here with me…”

Frisk was already shaking their head. “We’ve talked about this already, Toriel. I need to find a way to break the barrier trapping everyone in the Underground. I- I guess I don’t _have_ to, but I _want_ to.”

Toriel nodded sadly. “I know.” She knelt in front of Frisk and took their hands. “And I’m sure you’ll find a way.”

Frisk nodded and turned back to the door, shoving it open. A blast of icy wind threw a shiver down their spine. For a moment, they just stared at the snowy forest in front of them, then suddenly, they spun back and threw their arms around Toriel’s neck.

“I love you,” they whispered. “I’ll be back!” Then Frisk took off into the snow.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! If you got all the way to the end here, thanks for reading!
> 
> If you have any thoughts or criticisms, I would LOVE to hear them. Anything that could help me improve as a writer!!!
> 
> If anybody wants, I could maybe write a sort of follow up/sequel or something about Frisk going through a peaceful route. Let me know if that's something anyone would be interested in reading.
> 
> Thanks guys!


End file.
